What's In A Name?

Twenty-seven years ago, Pam and Reggie were sitting in Beaumont, Texas at St. Elizabeth's Hospital debating over a middle name for their precious, beautiful, lovely, divine, delightful, enchanting, flawless, wonderful, breathtaking baby daughter. By agreeing to disagree, I was robbed of a middle name. Going through life middle nameless is like a Dairy Queen ice cream cone without the curl on top. It's like Snap and Crackle with no Pop and like the Dallas Cowboys, with no Roy Williams... Incomplete. Do I feel inadequate when filling out standardized tests, applications, and other paperwork? I certainly did when I was younger. I used to sit in the junior high library during TASS testing with my immaculately sharpened number two pencil in hand, contemplating making up some remarkable middle name for myself. Then I decide that was a bad idea. I mean, I didn't want to get arrested for fraud! Or have to retake that hideous test. When I was in high school and began filling out applications for jobs, I would write N/A in the blank for a middle name instead of just leaving it bare. For some reason it made me feel more sufficient to put something in the blank space, which always prompted my interviewer to question the N/A. Then I would have to explain that I have no middle name, leaving me feeling more inadequate than ever. Then, when I moved on to college and there after, I gave up. Paperwork of all kind was left wanting when it came to that mocking vacant space intended for a middle name.

I should say that I was never too fond of my first name either. Being referred to as nickel, dime, quarter, dime sack, Lincoln, etc. very rapidly became unoriginal. Although, I have found as I have gotten older that the opposite sex finds the name Penny to be rather adorable. So even though I had no say and cannot claim any responsibility in naming myself, Penny has its charms... The reactions I get when someone discovers my secretive name shame is always the same. The individual will say my name out loud. Then laugh. Proclaim that I have the most wholesome, Texan-American name possible, and then feel that they must share this information with someone in close proximity to see if they also have the same enthusiasm. It is just now, on my twenty-seventh year that I have embraced my name and lack there of. I entered this era of enlightenment while I was reclining in Hollywood Theaters with my dear friend Schauna as we took in the flick, Love Happens. Eloise is the name I was coveting from this feature and I voiced my envy for Schauna to hear. "But your name is Penny! That's just as good as Eloise! And just as cute." She replied enthusiastically. Schauna was right. For the first time ever, I honest to God actually liked my name. So I do not need a middle name. My first name is cool enough to cover all the bases.

So thank you mom and dad. For keeping it simple and unique. Penny means, "Weaver of dreams." I like it. Hopefully I am just that. But it also means, "Duck", which is just weird and I have no further opinion concerning that interpretation. Mom says I was named Penny after one of her friends in college. I'm pretty sure I was named Penny due to my dad's obsession with the Beatles though... And the last name Baker, well that would be a whole other blog all itself. But to be Baker, is to know greatness ;)